Thursday, March 4, 2010

What is it With Me and Haircuts?

Some of my more loyal readers (2) will remember a past incident involving a very complicated haircut.

Well, it happened again - haircut weirdness. I think I attract this haircut weirdness, sort like a lightning rod attracts electrical particles from the sky.



While this was not as dramatic as the last time (as if anything could top the Mad Hair Scientist). It did make me laugh.

I had some time to kill after Allie's concert at the MALL because I had inexplicably agreed to let her do some MALL ratting for awhile after her performance. So I thought I'd slip out of the MALL (my favorite place to be) and go just down the street to "Create Glips" (the place where the previous incident went down).

Due to various logistical problems I had all-but decided I wasn't going to slip out after all and would instead find another way to kill a half hour. Then I walked by what-I-will-call the "hair place". It actually had "Design" and I think "Studio" and maybe "Style" in the name, (none-of-which my usual hair place have) so I was a little out-of-sorts right off the bat.

I actually did the walk by double-take - walked by, turned around...uh, nah....turn around again...wait, too much MALL time to kill....turn, hey that sign says $10 off haircuts...pacing a bit now, hmmm, that's a lot off a haircut, how much are these fancy haircuts?.....sign says "walk-ins welcome"....

Ok, ok, fine...

Boom, I'm in.

A guy is at the counter paying for what looks like a very ordinary haircut. This is a good sign.

I'm next and my "stylist" walks me back to her "station" but then tries to detour me to the sink/chair line for a quick shampoo. "Oh no," I tell her "I just want a haircut."

"But it relax you" (I'm not saying anything about ethnicity here)

"That's ok, I'm pretty relaxed."

She was not buying it, but we were moving on.

The haircut was going fine. She was nice and made decent small talk. Then I made a crack about "hating" a small streak of gray hair in the front of my head. This innocent (I don't really care) remark launched a cut, color, style, feather, comb-down barrage of possible techniques. At one point she said some people shave off the little patch in the center of your head to get rid of bangs that hang down (really?). "Wow, that just sounds like shaving a hole the middle of your head to me" I said.

And were moving on again.

I was learning a lot and it was really augmenting my training from last time, it was like earning CEU's.

At one point she told me how she cuts big (see "Fat") guy's hair to be contoured in the back so it hides their neck fat.......I'm going to say that again - SO IT HIDES THEIR NECK FAT.

Gotta say I did not see that one coming. Lesson on neck fat camouflage, check.

Moving on.

The hair cut is over, I'm heading toward the front to pay, she says "I know you don't want it, but let's rinse the hair off you, that hair not good for you, get in eyes."

".....uhm....ok...wait...what?"

(I'm sitting down in the sink/chair now)

(water runs)

"You relax."

(Um, ok)

Just water so far then, BAM, shampoo in my hair...aaaaand rubbing.

(Hey, this feels pretty good, I guess)

The other stylist, from the back of the SALON, says "You have a good shampoo."

I said, "She tricked me."

We all laughed, I'm still laughing.

The rest of the experience went off without a hitch and I'm sure to be looking 15 years younger with my new skill set. If I ever really let myself go and get unsightly neck fat I'm set for what to do there as well.

PS:

I really think I might be turning into a freakish little man that weird stuff just sorta happens to....until finally one day......he goes loony.

3 comments:

Courtney Hilton said...

turning into? something you are is a good thing right. This hair cut have happy ending? I love you long time and stuff.. lol I have a hair cut from a 5'0 asian girl once she couldn't reach my hair in from so she straddled my leg and cut my hair (i called it hair cut and a lap dance) best hair cut ever. lol

Anonymous said...

So, you are thinking you don't have neck fat yet? Just asking.

Anonymous said...

I laughed so hard I cried!